TO Be 6 Again...

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was
looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not
far off he asked what she'd like to
have for her birthday.

'I'd like to be six again', she replied, still looking in the mirror .

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall
of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was
reeling and her stomach felt upside
down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a
chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy,
M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed
exhausted.


He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being six
again?'

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

'I meant my dress size, you retard!!!!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna
get it wrong.



TO Be 6 Again...

PACQUIAO Jokes!

Genie: Bibigyan kita ng isang kahilingan.

Aling Dionisia: Talaga?...gusto ko gumanda!

Genie: Buksan mo ang bote.

Aling Dionisia: At gaganda na ako?

Genie: Hindi. Babalik na lang ako.

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------

Pacman: Sabi ng titser ko, bakit daw ang eggplant walang egg?

Aling Dionisia: Sabihon mo sa titser mo, na pag me egg yun, turta na yan, TURTA!

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------

Reporter: Nguang nanalo ka Manny, anong pasalubong mo kay Jinkee?

Manny: Ibon syempre. Mahilig sya dun e.

Reporter: Ibon? Anong klaseng ibon?

Manny: Yung mga lipstek, pangmik up ba? Basta mga Ibon products! Yo know…

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------

Dionesia: Doc gusto ko magpalagay ng breast.

Doctor (gulat) magpapasexsi ka na?

Dionesia: Breast sa ngipen ba. Paraumayos yun ngepen ko! Deba uso yon?

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------

Pacquiao: Wala, talo ka na kahit anung gawin mo..

Hatton: Pagandahan na lang tayo ng nanay!

Pacquiao: Ah! Wala namang ganyanan. I mean you know…

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------

Aling Dionisia: Inday, akina nga yung seeds ko.

Inday: Bakit po magtatanim po ba kayo?

Aling Dionisia: Anung magtatanim sinasabi mo? Nasisilaw ang mata ko kaya kailangan ko yung seeds.


---------- ---------- ---------- --------- --------- ----------

Jinky: Manny, kung magkakaanak ulet tayu anu magandang name?
Manny: Hmm. Eh di combine na lang name natin… “MANKY”......

---------- ---------- ---------- --------- ---------- ----------

Aling Dionisia: Gusto ko naman pag
nagka-anak kayo uli ni Jinky, di lang pangalan nyo pagsasamahin. Dapat
kasali din pangalan ko.
Manny: Oo naman nay, kasu midyu mahirap yun.
Aling Dionisia: Hindi ah, may naesep na nga ako eh.
Manny: Talaga 'nay? Anu?
Aling Dionisia: DIOMANJI (dionisia-manny- jinky)

--------- ------- -------- --------- --------- ---------

Pacquiao: Honey, buksan mo na yung sweets.
Jinky : Lambing mo talaga. mwah !! Nasan ang sweets honey?
Pacquiao: Yung sweets ng ilaw. di ako makakita… ang dilim!!

--------- ------- -------- ------- ------- -----------

Si Manny Pacquiao tumakbo sa pagka-Congressman sa GenSan...
Reporter: Manny, anong masasabi mo sa peace and order sa inyong lugar sa .Gen San?
Manny: Ah, yun ba? uhmm...eh... ang masasabi kulang diyan ay....
Reporter: Ano..?
Manny: Ahh, kwan,...maraming Fish sa Gen San pero wala masyado umo-Order .

--------- --------- -------- -------- -------- ----------

Freddie and Manny heart to heart talk
Manny: Pare, ba't naman hanggang ngayon wala ka pang syota? Wala ka pa bang napupusuan?
Freddie: Meron. .. Manhid ka lang!

--------- --------- -------- -------- -------- ---------

Noodle!!
Noodle!! Noodle!!
- Manny Pacquiao sa Deal or No Deal

-------- ---------- -------- -------- --------- --------

Sa Las Vegas
Waiter: May i take your order, Madam?
Aling Dionisia: Soup
Waiter: Chicken, asparagus, noodle, fish or soup of the day?
Aling Dionisia: Soup drenks!

--------- ---------- --------- --------- ------- --------

Sa isang Birthday Party
Aling Dionisia: Blue!!! Blue the Kick!!!!

--------- ---------- ------- --------- -------- --------

You is!' 'you is! you is!', sigaw ni Aling Dionisia pagdating sa Amerika..Andito na ako sa 'you is!'

-------- ---------- -------- --------- ------- ----------

Chavit: Manny, paki - acknowledge naman si 1st Gentleman, late dumating.. ayun kadadaan lang sa tabi ng ringside.
Manny: I would like to acknowledge the ARRIVAL OF THE LATE 1st GENTLEMAN WHO JUST PASSED AWAY!!

Batman and Joker

Facebook cheezy version of Migs and Bulilit

Jacqueline Bermejo September 29

I am issuing this statement to clear my name in the current controversy in which I allegedly posted a highly insensitive and offensive message on the social networking website, Facebook, in relation to the victims of typhoon Ondoy that recently struck parts of the Philippines.

About two years ago, an anonymous source created these accounts using my identity, posting my personal details, my real pictures captioned roughly and attacking other people.. Because of these incidents, I reported such abuses and sent my credentials to the administrators of such sites, particularly Facebook. I have been abused and am still being abused online in social networking websites such as Facebook, Friendster, Multiply etc.

In the early stages, I was advised by close friends to ignore the situation, saying this would simply go away. Unfortunately, it has not stopped. Hence, I filed a complaint with the Dubai Police about eight months ago hoping they could help me with my problem. Should anyone wish to check my statement, my case is still under investigation with said authorities.

Time passed and these sites continued to generate malicious, obscene and cruel messages that are widely exposed and relayed to the public under my name.

Yesterday, September 27th 2009, I received phone calls from my close friends regarding very alarming posts in the above mentioned websites that directly offended flood victims as a result of typhoon Ondoy..

These malicious statement(s) which are posted under account names Jacque or Jackie are not of my doing. It is unfortunate that such statements were maliciously attributed to me and I do sympathize and understand the adverse and somehow verbally violent reaction that has been elicited by such insensitive statements or posts. Rest assured, I have taken every legal step that can be done in this regard.

I too, have become a victim as much as those who may have lost their lives and properties to such a devastating natural calamity. This recent controversy has greatly affected my reputation, my family, and my friends. I am devastated and shocked at the extent my character, my personal information and private space have been violated.

I have a deep respect and regard for my country. I am proud to be a Filipino and would never say or do anything to harm the interest of my country or countrymen. I have also had the privilege of participating in civic-oriented activities in Dubai, particularly in trying to help my fellow countrymen seek employment during the height of mass layoffs brought about by the ongoing global financial crisis, as well as those seeking employment for the first time. Making a mockery of any unfortunate incidents befalling any of my fellow Filipinos is simply contrary to my character. I condemn the person or persons behind these malicious acts to impute damage on my integrity and I hope that you can dig deep into your hearts and minds to truly find the truth in all these.

Who is Jacque, Jackie, Jacqueline Bermejo?

Jacque Bermejo – this is the name of the Filipina in Dubai now dubbed as the “dumbest Pinay” after posting a Facebook wall comment tantamount to being heartless and inhumane.

Jacque Bermejo commented on the Definitely Filipino Facebook page saying the following lines: “buti n lng am hir in dubai! maybe so many sinners bak der! so yeah deserving wat hapend!”

Jacque Bermejo needless to say is now an Internet Star, but we don’t think she’s enjoying her popularity. Filipinos all over the world hate her for her comment, some calling her names and a few even now campaigning for her to be declared a personan non grata.

Who is Jacque Bermejo?

Jacqueline Bermejo is a Marketing and PR Officer based in Dubai. Yes, she is a PR Officer and she obviously needs to do more than miracles to rebuild her reputation after this Facebook scandal.

Jacqueline has been working in the Middle East for over four years and currently works in real estate and property development.

If you need to contact her for whatever reason:

Tel: +971 4 4329633
Fax: +971 4 4329632
Mob: +971 50 3416640

Jacque Bermejo Pictures

This is the face that launched a thousand blog posts, Facebook comments and wall posts.

The Rancher

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but

knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided

to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the

house than the drunk.


He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and

knew a lot about ranching.



For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very

well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand,



'You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You

should go into town and kick up your heels.' The hired hand readily agreed

and went into town one Saturday night.



One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no
hired hand.

GIANT CATERPILLAR FOUND IN AUSTRALIA.

mwehehehe!

PEPITO'S RESUME

Resimay
To hoom it mae cunsern,

I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.

I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..

I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.

I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.

My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.

Sinseerly,

PEPITO

PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.

Employer's response:

Dear Pepito ,

It's OK honey, we've got spell check.

See you Monday

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate.

****************************************************************************************************************************************************************

DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 ;program.These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck Babe!
Tech Support

Ligaw Tips ni Bob Ong

Dear Mr. Bob Ong,
Matagal ko na pong nililigawan itong ramp model na stage actress na nakilala ko recently sa isang party. Nasisiraan na ako ng bait. Pag nakilala mo siya, tiyak matutunaw ang utak mo sa kakaisip sa kanya.
Hingi lang po ako ng advice. Paano ko po siya mapapaibig? Bibigyan ko ba siya ng tula ? Haharanahin ko ba siya? Roses? Kalachuchi? Chocnut at sampaguita?
In lab na po ako. Ano po ang gagawin ko? Is she the one.
Lubos na gumagalang,
- Bartolome -

- ANG REPLY -

Dear Bartolome,
Hindi ka talaga sasagutin niyang nililigawan mo. Napaka-old school kasi ng mga tactics mo. Wala nang gumagawa ng ganyan. Sa panahon ngayon, lahat ng bagay, nagtaas na. Nagtaas na ang gasolina, nagtaas na ang presyo ng bigas at mga bilihin, nagtaas na ang pamasahe, at lalong nagtaas na rin ng standards ang mga babae. Hindi na uubra yang siopao at kalachuci mo. Lalo na yung huli mong binigay, hopia at santan. Ano ba pare? Ano’ng era ka ba pinanganak?
Pero don’t worry. It’s not too late. May pag-asa ka pa. Hindi pa naman siya kinakasal at di pa niya sinasagot yung crush niya na basketball player. Kahit lamang siya ng sampung paligo sa’yo, daanin mo sa utak at creativity. Dahil aminin na natin, iyon na lang talaga ang pag-asa mo. Heto, bibigyan kita ng mga simple, tried and tested na mga regalo para di siya mapurga sa hopia at siomai. Sundin mo ‘to, tiyak na lalaglag ang bagang niya sa’yo. Mga medyo more than your usual regalong panligaw:

1. Bili ka ng century tuna. Ilagay mo sa isang napakalaking box—yung sinlaki ng TV o kaya box ng desktop PC mo. Tapos balutan mo ng magarang pambalot. Kuntsabahin mo na yung teacher niya sa Calculus. Sa gitna ng klase, bigla kang kumatok sa classroom. Pero dapat, incognito ka. Magsuot ka ng LBC jacket, magshades, at magsuot ng surgical mask. Pagpasok mo sa classroom, iabot mo yung box sa teacher, at papirmahin mo ng acknowledgement receipt. Tapos pabuksan mo in front of everyone. Tignan mong mabuti ang reaction sa mukha niya.

Later during the day, pag tinanong niya kung bakit Century Tuna ang binigay mo, iikot mo yung lata at ituro mo yung sign na “Omega 8.” Pag tinanong niya kung ano yung Omega 8, sabihin mo: “because you’re good for my heart.”

2. Mangolekta ka ng isang dosenang hanger na libre mong nakukuha tuwing nagpapa-dry clean ka. Tapos, sa bawat hanger, isulat mo: “I miss hanging out with you.”
3. Instead of roses, kuha ka ng tissue paper sa banyo ng school mo. Gawin mong tissue paper roses. Gawa ka ng isang dosena. Pag-abot mo, sabihin mo, “Ganito kalinis ang pag-ibig ko sa’yo.”
4. Bili ka ng tetra pack ng mantikang Minola. Tapos bilugan mo yung “with Omega 8.” Hindi na siya magtatanong kung bakit.

5. Bigyan mo ng ice cream cone. Dapat cone lang at walang ice cream. Pag hinanap niya yung ice cream, sabihin mo, “natunaw na kakatitig sa’yo.”

6. Bili ka ng sandosenang box ng crayola. Kolektahin mo lahat ng black. Lagay mo sa isang box ng crayola. Sa likod, isulat mo: “Walang kulay ang buhay kung wala ka.”
7. Bigyan mo siya ng mumurahing bumbilya. Alam mo na siguro by this time kung ano ang isasagot pag tinanong niya kung bakit. (para sa mga hindi maka-“gets”, kapag tinanong ka, ang sagot mo ay, “sapagkat, ikaw lamang ang tanging ilaw at liwanag sa buhay ko”, o kaya naman ay, “you light up my life”…

8. I-text mo siya ng: “Hindi tayo tao, hindi tayo hayop, hindi tayo halaman. Bagay tayo. Bagay!”
9. Bigyan mo siya ng calling card ng MMDA. Sa likod, isulat mo “para pag nagkabanggaan ang puso natin.”
10. Padalhan mo ng Happy Meal pero huwag mong ibibigay yung libreng laruan. Paghinanap niya, sabihin mo: “Ako yung freebie, at ikaw yung meal na nagpapahappy sa’kin.”
11. Sunugin ang kanyang bahay at padalhan ng hallmark card: "aanhin mo pa ang bahay mo, kung matagal ka nang nakatira sa puso ko"

12. Pagatapos sunugin ang kanyang bahay, padalhan siya ng isang box ng posporo, Guitar brand. unahan ang kanyang galit at sabihin, "ayan ang posporo na ginamit ko sa pagsunog ng iyong bahay, match na tayo"
13. Sa kalagitnaan ng isang malupit na bagyo, pasalubungan sya ng "salbabida", wag payong, o mainit na mami. Pag nagtanong bakit? ang isagot mo ay " ayaw kong malunod ka sa pag mamahal ko."

14. Pag pumayag na siyang makipagdate, dalhin mo siya sa canteen at huwag bibitawan ang kamay. Pag tinanong niya kung bakit, ituro mo yun sign na “don’t leave your valuables unattended”

Handang tumulong lagi,

-Bob Ong-

Michael Jackson Pepsi Commercial Accident

Piolo Need Five Things...

Piolo Need Five Things...



Piolo:




I just need 5 things to live…




Some friends…

Some food…

Some work…

Some love…

And some…




Milby.

Movies to watch this 2009

Hello kids! here are the movies for 2009 that you don't want to miss.

Tips for a fuller life

This is without a doubt one of the nicest good luck forwards I have received. Hope it works for you -- and me!
You have 6 minutes

There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious. This has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far.

Do not keep this message.

This must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.
FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson .
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.



Now, here's the FUN part!
Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve. 1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.
5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.
9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks
15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

Do not keep this message

12 Ways to Know That You Love Someone

TWELVE:
You talk with him/her late at night and when you go to bed you still think of him/her.

ELEVEN:
You walk really slowly when you are with him/her.

TEN:
You don't feel Ok when he/she is far away...

NINE:
You smile when you hear his/her voice.

EIGHT:
When you look at him/her,you do not see other people around you. You see only him/her.

SIX:
He/She is everything you want to think.

FIVE:
You realise that you smile every time you look at him/her.

FOUR:
You would do anything to see him/her.

THREE:
While you have been reading this, there was a person in your mind all the time.

TWO:
You've been so busy thinking of that person that you didn't notice that number 7 is missing.

ONE:
You are going to check above if that's true and now you are silently laughing to yourself.

NOW MAKE A WISH! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT THE MOST.......


*****

ALMOST THERE!


Send this message to at least 12 friends like that: 12 WAYS TO KNOW THAT YOU LOVE SOMEONE

*And something good is going to happen tonight....

*If you don't do it...you will definitely regret it....

A Husband's Letter to His Wife & the Wife's Reply Regarding Their Sex Life

TO MY DEAR WIFE:
During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times.
I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days.
The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:
54 times the sheets were clean
17 times it was too late
49 times you were too tired
20 times it was too hot
15 times you pretended to be sleep
22 times you had a headache
17 times you were afraid of waking the baby
16 times you said you were too sore

12 times it was the wrong time of the month
19 times you had to get up early
9 times you said weren't in the mood
7 times you were sunburned
6 times you were watching the late show
5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo
3 times you said the neighbors would hear us
9 times you said your mother would hear us

Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory because:

6 times you just lay there
8 times you reminded me there ' s a crack in the ceiling
4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with
7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished
1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you moved

KEEP READING.......

============ ========= ========= ========= =========


TO MY DEAR HUSBAND:
I think you are a little confused. Here are the reasons why you didn ' t get more than you did:
5 times you came home drunk and tried to screw the cat
36 times you did not come home at all
21 times you didn ' t cum
33 times you came too soon
19 times you went soft before you got in
38 times you worked too late
10 times you got cramps in your toes
29 times you had to get up early to play golf
2 times you were in a fight and someone kicked you in the balls
4 times you got it stuck in your zipper
3 times you had a cold and your nose was running
2 times you had a splinter in your finger
20 times you lost the notion after thinking about it all day
6 times you came in your pajamas while reading a dirty book
98 times you were too busy watching TV



Of the times we did get together:
The reason I laid still was because you missed and were screwing the sheets.
I wasn ' t talking about the crack in the ceiling, what I said was, "Would you prefer me on my back or kneeling?"
The time you felt me move was because you farted and I was trying to breathe.


Once you read this letter you have to keep it going.
This game has been played since 1996. You must send this letter to 7 people.
On the 5th day someone will ask you out or say "I love you."

This is not a joke.
It has worked for many years. If you break the chain, you will have bad luck with guys/girls forever. This is just for future readers. This began in 1996, not much of a past, but it works.

So here are the rules:
If you read this on a Sunday, wish for a good week
If you read this on a Monday, wish for money
If you read this on a Tuesday, wish for love
If you read this on a Wednesday, wish for success
If you read this on a Thursday, wish for anything you want
If you read this on a Friday, wish for a really hot date
If you read this on a Saturday, wish for an important phone call

Send this to seven people (after you make a wish). Make sure it is sent as soon as you read it or your wish won ' t come true. And check!

Paano kaya kung may FACEBOOK na nung panahon ng KKK at Hen. AGUINALDO?

Lucky Man Marries Thai Twins!

Only in thailand

Lucky Man Marries Thai Twins!
(Translated from the Thai Rath Newspaper)

After Mr Wichai (Tao), aged 24, from Samut Songkram province, who earns his living by dealing in old goods, got married to gorgeous twins Ms Sirintara and Ms Thipawan 22, he vouched his sincerest 'equal love' for both of them!

Mr Wichai, just yesterday, got married in a grand ceremony to both twins simultaneously.

On being interviewed by Thai Rath reporters, Mr Wichai declared wholeheartedly that he didn't see much problem in having t o perform tiresome marital duties with two wives.

In the engagement ceremony before the wedding, Mr Wichai successfully offered a dowry of eight baht of gold and 80,000 baht EACH for his lovely darlings.

Both families celebrated the marriage with joy and were said to be delighted for the threesome.

Mr Wichai told the press that he had been best of friends with his neighbouring twins since they were children.

'When I grew older, I would walk past their house each morning and try to decide for myself which one I fancied more, but it was darn impossible - I adored BOTH of them - I just couldn't decide which one of them to chat up......!'
He went on to say, 'For three continuous years all three of us would go on dates together, until there was one day when I couldn't stand the frustration any longer and told them, 'I love you and want to marry you BOTH''
The fortunate Mr Wichai, instead of getting a slap in the face, was overjoyed when both girls admitted to having sworn all along that they wished to marry the same man!

'It wasn't easy at first, what with the neighbours gossiping, but our family sympathized, understood, and fully supported our mutual love for the one man' the twins said.

Mr Wichai arranged for his brides to live with him in his family house after the wedding, and his mother has already proudly prepared TWO rooms for the newly-weds.

Our reporters were just gagging to hear the response to this mouth-watering question:-
"And.... what are the sleeping arrangements Mr Wichai?", to which he replied modestly with a beaming smile.

'Absolutely no problems! For the first three nights of the week, I will sleep with Ms Thipawan and the next three will be spent with Ms Siri ntara. As for every Saturday, the three of us will sleep together'

Ms Sirintara finally told the press, 'When my twin and I worked as assistant nurses, we promised each other that we would never leave each other's side, and that our future husband would have to either take us both, or leave us.'

Unemployed graduate

An unemployed graduate woke up one morning and checked his pocket. All he had left was $10. He decided to use it to buy food and then wait for death as he was too proud to go begging. He was frustrated as he could find no job, and nobody was ready to help him.

He bought food and as he sat down to eat, an old man and two little children came along and asked him to help them with food as they had not eaten for almost a week. He looked at them. They were so lean that he could see their bones coming out. Their eyes had gone into the socket. With the last bit of compassion he had, he gave them the food. The old man and children prayed that God would bless and prosper him and then gave him a very old coin. The young graduate said to them 'you need the prayer more than I do'

With no money, no job, no food, the young graduate went under the bridge to rest and wait for death. As he was about to sleep, he saw an old newspaper on the ground.. He picked it up, and suddenly he saw an advertisement for people with old coins to come to a certain address.


He decided to go there with the old coin the old man gave him. On getting to the place, he gave the proprietor the coin. The proprietor screamed, brought out a big book and showed the young graduate a photograph. This same old coin was worth 3 million dollars. The young graduate was overjoyed as the proprietor gave him a bank draft for 3 million dollars within an hour. He collected the Bank Draft and went in search of the old man and little children.

By the time he got to where he left them eating, they had gone. He asked the owner of the canteen if he knew them. He said no but they left a note for you. He quickly opened the note thinking it would lead him to find them.

This is what the note said: 'You gave us your all and we have rewarded you back with the coin,' signed God the Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost. 1 Kings 17:10-16; Matthew 11:28-30

PRAYER:
Here is your financial blessing! It's a simple prayer, you've got 30 seconds. If you need a financial blessing, continue reading this e-mail.

Heavenly Father, most Gracious and Loving God,
I pray to you that you abundantly Bless my family and me. I know that you recognize, that a family is more than just a mother, father, sister, brother husband and wife, but all Who believe and trust in you.

Father, I send up a prayer request for financial blessing for not only the person who sent this to me, but for Me and all that I have forwarded this message on to. And that the power of joined prayer by those who believe and trust in you is more powerful than anything.

I thank you in advance for your blessings.
Father God, deliver the person reading this right now and those who will read it in the near future from debt and debt burdens. Release your Godly wisdom that I may be a good steward over all that You have given me Father, for I know how wonderful and mighty You are and how if we just obey You and walk in Your word and have the faith of a Mustard seed that You will pour out blessings..
I thank You now Lord for the recent blessings I have received and for the blessings yet to come Because I know You are not done with me yet.
In His name, I pray,
Amen

SEND THIS TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS AND YOU WILL BE BLESSED